I don't know why. It can't be PMS cos my period is just over. Maybe I am just feeling a bit down about my life. So, I am taking it out on people around me.
I am very contented with my life and I am a very happy person. But this thing with my mom is a never ending battle and I think I have a lot of pent-up frustration. Thus, I guess I can't really let go of the past of who's right and who's wrong. There is still a lot of anger in me and she can so easily trigger it. She is still the same and when she triggers it, she will bring back all the memories about what I think she has done wrong to me.
In her eyes, she probably think I have done a lot of things wrong. That is why she treat me the way she has. And I know she has done it out of love.
But no matter how much I know it and but I still can't change the way I react to her. I can't change and erase my anger and dissatisfaction with the history we had because in my eyes she has done it wrong. And I am very vicious when I have my outburst.
Today, unfortunately my dad has to take the brunt of my outburst.
I feel better now but I could really feel all my anger (a mountain of it) during my outburst. It was quite scary.
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